Blog 17/52 A Mother’s Love (Poem)

A poem about a mother's love.

others show love in different ways

nd some more than others, because they also have bad days.

esting and taking a day off isn’t an option in this job.

ou’ll understand when you’re a mother too, she says.

aring for us without asking for anything in return, tomorrow or now.

ven willing to give up their share, so that we can eat the full meal.

oving us in their own way — the only way they know how

 

Happy Mother’s Day to every mother out there. ♥

Blog 16/52 The Past

I’ve been thinking about my “past” for a few days now. Things I did when I was a kid (like literally 5 – 12 years old), that are so embarrassing, so wrong, or just plain irrational. Or the things that happened in my teenage years. I have a lot of demons. Some I face, some I run from.

Alice Cooper Riverdale Season 1 Finale Quote
Alice Cooper (to Betty), Riverdale, S1E13: Chapter Thirteen: The Sweet Hereafter

Despite it all, I can’t change what has already occurred. Even if I get my hands on a time machine, I can’t change them as it may change the life I have now. I’ve always said that I stand by the things I do. As I won’t do them if I don’t believe in them. Yet, these things I did, bring me shame and guilt.

It’s hard to let go of it. Of all the guilt (and shame). I try but it ain’t easy. So how do we let go of the past?

IHMO, it should start with the truth.

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I loved this quote from #Daddy Fred Andrews. You have to be honest with yourself and with others. You must free yourself from lies so that it doesn’t overwhelm you. Stop lying and start living with the truth.

And then, face the past. Come clean and try to admit everything. Even just to yourself.

Here’s another quote from Fred Andrews that relates to me so much.

Fred Andrews (to Archie), Riverdale, S1E2: Chapter Two: A Touch of Evil

I agree with Fred. To make sure you don’t have to run from your past, you have to face it head on. No matter what the cost, the truth will always be worth it in the end. 

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Blog 15/52 On the inside

all this darkness I try to hide
all these buried demons
keep coming back no matter how I tried
no time to make lemonades from lemons

there’s nothing to do but cry
i come up for air
but i get greeted by
life that’s never fair

there’s no point complaining
this world is my chrysalid
stop being a bitch and the whining
like my feelings were never valid

‘man it up and be tough’
always the advice, usually unsolicited
so i cry on the inside and thus the curtain goes up
the possibilities are unlimited.

the world becomes my stage
as i try to pretend i’m okay
even though it’s really my cage
on the inside i decay.

Blog 14/52 Favorite Music

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My taste in music is pretty random. I’m not really a hipster, though. I just listen to music I like, whether it’s mainstream or not.

1. Ashley Tisdale

I’ve always loved Ashley’s sound. There’s something about her voice that just resonates with me. Here are some of her songs and covers that I absolutely adore.

Chris French’s voice is also perfect and you can’t just stop falling in love with it.

Just heard this last night it was AMAZIIIINNNGGGGGG Smiling Face With Heart-Eyes on EmojiOne 3.0

This one’s with another fave voices of mine, Vanessa Hudgens.

The song that I have sang a hundred times in high school:

I also loved her vocals here:

And how vulnerable this song sounds:

Before this turns into an Ashley Tisdale playlist, let’s move on.

2. Dawin’s Sidekick

This song just makes me wanna dance. I’m putting the video where I first found it.

3. Little Mix

This is the first song of theirs I listened to. And fell in love with.

Love this very danceable song.

4. Miley Cyrus

I loved Miley since her Hannah Montana days. (And I’m very happy that she decided to go back to her roots.) Whatever she look like, I can’t deny that her voice is just so powerful.

Her cover of “Don’t Dream It’s Over” sung with Ariana Grande is just soulful. Smiling Face With Heart-Eyes on EmojiOne 3.0

This song was one of those that helped me through the downs.

5. Bruno Mars

Another one of the feel good songs I listen to.

His latest song makes me wanna dance too.

And this one is great too.

6. Jessie J’s Who You Are

I listen to this song when I need a pick-me-up.

Blog 13/52 Learning a New Language

I think that our minds are destined/scientifically wired to learn new things everyday. And so, I feel like I need to at least learn something new each day.

Learning a new language is difficult. I’m lucky that I learned English as a kid so it comes naturally to me now. I can say that I’m fluent in English. But my mind wants more. It wants to learn more. We all have that craving for new information. When we gossip, it’s because our brains crave for new information. Why not channel that craving into something healthier?

Here’s some languages you can learn online:

1. Spanish

Being a previous colony of the Spaniards, the Filipino language have a lot in common with the Spanish language. Which makes it easier to learn.

You can check out FutureLearn as they teach basic spanish free, or you can look for language apps in the App Store. Real Fast Spanish have a free 5-step course for you to learn Spanish easy.

2. French

We all know that French is the sexiest language. However, it may be one of the hardest languages to learn. You can look online for free language courses. You can also visit BBC’s site where they give free basic online lessons.

3. Japanese

You don’t need to be an Otaku to learn Nihongo. Clayton McKnight’s website aims to help us learn the Japanese language easiest way.

*You may also install the app Duolingo where several languages are being taught, or visit their website at https://www.duolingo.com/. 

4. Code

Of course, you can leave out this new language — the language of programming. There are many online sites that offer free (as well as premium) tutorial services for beginners like us.

There’s SkillCrush, Code.org, SkillShare, CodeCademy and a whole lot more.

You can also visit CodeSkulptor and PythonTutor. (Thanks Dina! Smiling Face With Smiling Eyes on EmojiOne 3.0)

5. Music

This includes singing and dancing as well as playing instruments. There’s a lot of free tutorials that can be found at YouTube. If you have money to spend, you can signup at Udemy where hundreds of people are aching to teach music and dance.


What language are you gonna learn today?

Blog 12/52 How to Celebrate Your Birthday (the affordable way)

Girl with birthday balloons

So that rhymes… Smiling Face With Open Mouth & Closed Eyes on EmojiOne 3.0 Moving on…

My birthday is coming soon… Well, in about a month. Next month. I know I’m too excited but I just feel that this year’s birthday needs to be celebrated with something special. However, the thing is, I’m broke as !@#$. So I have to think of other ways to make it special. In the process, I wanna share the things I came up with.

1. Bake your own cake.

If you’re the type who knows how to bake (or at least cook), you should try making your own cake. Heck, if you love cake then DO IT!

Even if you don’t have an oven, you can try baking with your rice cooker. Here’s one I found in YouTube.

2. Have a Potluck Party with friends.

If you’re the type to party, then this one’s for you. Since you’re broke, you can ask friends to bring something for the party. And to make sure no one’s gonna bring the same thing more than twice, write down the stuff you think you’ll need for the party. And then assign them to those you’ll be inviting. You can also tell them that if they forgot to bring something, just buy some snacks or drinks to get past the door.

You provide the venue, they provide the booze and the food. Win-win! Thumbs Up on emojidex 1.0.24

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Just in case you don’t have a clue on what to ask your friends to bring, here are some:

  • Guitar (or any instrument) – So that you guys can jam!
  • Ice – It’s not a bad idea to have so much ice. You’ll never have too much ice.
  • Bread – You can make sandwiches, DIY pizzas, and toasts so make sure to ask them to bring some spreads, sauces and toppings too.
  • Junk food such as chips and popcorn – Because.
  • Sodas and Booze.
  • Dessert – You can ask them to bring cupcakes, chocolate bars and candies!
  • Cheese – You can do a lot of things with cheese.
  • Eggs – You can cook it in a lot of ways. Also, have you tried deviled eggs? Yum!
  • Frozen Pizza – for when you just want to be done with it.
  • Cake-mix – Or a brownie mix.
  • A pot of guacamole or some other dip.
  • Instant noodles – instant Ramen is also nice. Smiling Face With Open Mouth & Closed Eyes on EmojiOne 3.0

Of course, there are more possible things your friends can bring. You can also ask your friends what they are willing to bring.

3. Schedule a visit to your parents.

I’m sure they’ll be more than happy to take you out on your birthday. Unless, you had a fallout, then you can go and make amends. That would be a nice way to spend your day.

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4. Participate in a marathon.

Okay, I meant a streaming marathon.

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If you prefer to spend your day indoors, probably with your SO or your BFF, and watch Netflix. If you don’t already have an account, ask a friend to lend you their account for a day. It’s your birthday after all. They’ll probably let you.

There’s a ton of shows available on Netflix and I’m sure you’ll be able to finish some of the TV series in a day. I have. Winking Face on EmojiOne 3.0

5. Sleep in.

Last, but not the least, sleeping in with your SO. This is the only day when you can’t be shamed for sleeping. It is your day. You can do whatever the F you want to do with it.

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Got more to add? Tell me in the comments? Smiling Face With Smiling Eyes on EmojiOne 3.0

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Blog 11/52 Commentary on Shakespeare

To be honest, I haven’t really read Shakespeare. And it’s because I can’t enjoy reading too much Old English. It’s like my brain hurts when I try. (Update: So I just found out that Shakespeare’s work is much readable than Old English. And that it’s actually written in “Early Modern English”.)

So here’s what I’m gonna do. I’m gonna find three works done by Shakespeare, read the summary/plot and react to it. I’ll be basing my review/comments from that summary.

Be informed that I chose these titles randomly. So I’m choosing…

  1. Macbeth
  2. The Merchant of Venice
  3. A Midsummer Night’s Dream

Let’s start!

1. Macbeth

I used eNotes.com’s summary. My comments:

  • “His wife, Lady Macbeth, urges him to seize the opportunity and take the throne. One night, Macbeth murders King Duncan in his sleep, then frames the guards for the crime.”Lady Macbeth’s like, “Carpe Diem!” and Macbeth was like, “You mean kill the King? Okay!” 
  • “To protect himself, Macbeth has Banquo killed.” I think Shakespeare may be an ancestor of GRRM. 
  • “Duncan’s sons Malcolm and Donalbain flee Scotland, where they begin plotting against Macbeth.” Why did Malcolm and Donalbain flee? Isn’t one of them supposed to be the heir?
  • “One of their allies, Macduff, poses a serious threat to Macbeth, so the new king has Macduff crowned king.”And now Macduff is king? Like how?
  • “Overcome with remorse over the murder of King Duncan, Lady Macbeth commits suicide.” Lady Macbeth was like, “Dude, I said Carpe Diem like kiss ass and suck up to the king, not kill him!” Macbeth was like “too late!” so she commits suicide instead. 
  • “Macduff, the product of a gruesome c-section, was not “of woman born”. — HEY! JUST BECAUSE HE’S C-SECTION DOESN’T MEAN HE’S NOT OF WOMAN BORN! 
  • “realizes too late that the witches’ prophecies foretold his death and not his success.” You should have checked for loopholes, dude. 

So this story is a bit dark for me (but, hey, I love GoT, so…) Although, if it’s not written in Old English I might have read it. The plot twists are nicely put. Good job Shakespeare!

2. The Merchant of Venice

I used the summary from No Sweat Shakespeare. Commentary:

  • “the loan must be repaid in three months or Shylock will exact a pound of flesh from Antonio.”Okay. Shylock’s dark humor isn’t really funny. 
  • “Even when Bassanio offers much more than the amount in repayment, Shylock, now infuriated by the loss of his daughter, is intent on seeking revenge on the Christians. The Duke refuses to intervene.”A lot is happening here. Shylock needs to calm the fuck down. We can get your daughter back, okay? Just say you’re okay with her new lover and everything will be fine. Also, why the heck is the Duke doing nothing? What’s your purpose if not to intervene with such horrific deals?
  • “Moreover, for conspiring to murder a Venetian citizen, Portia orders that he should forfeit all his wealth.”Okay, calm down, Portia. That’s just greedy. He’s just mad. You already denied his revenge. That should have been enough. 
  • “Antonio gives his half back to Shylock on the condition that Shylock bequeath it to his disinherited daughter, Jessica. Shylock must also convert to Christianity.” And you, Antonio. Why did you have to ask him to convert? Let him choose his own religion!
  • “With the exception of Shylock, all celebrate a happy ending to the affair.” Yeah, because you guys have forced him to do things he doesn’t want to. 

I was slightly shocked that at the end, I was feeling for Shylock. I mean, he’s clearly some kind of a psychopath but I really feel like that kind of redemption for the protagonists doesn’t fit. I don’t know…

Also, why did Portia make Shylock convert? Is that really in the law? I don’t think Christianity works like that. But what do I know, right?

3. A Midsummer Night’s Dream

I used this summary from GradeSaver. My comments:

  • “Egeus tells Theseus that Hermia refuses to marry Demetrius, wanting instead to marry Lysander. He asks for the right to punish Hermia with death if she refuses to obey.” Okay. First of all, that kind of disobedience doesn’t have to be punishable by death. I know this is fiction and this practice is old, but still. 
  • “They tell their plan to Helena, a girl who is madly in love with Demetrius. Hoping to gain favor with Demetrius, Helena decides to tell him about the plan.” If you’re gonna elope secretly, don’t tell anyone. SERIOUSLY. It’s called a secret for a reason. And you, Helena, you were given a chance to get the guy, and you betray them. WTF? Stupid much?
  • “Titania and Oberon soon arrive and begin arguing about a young boy Titania has stolen and is caring for. Oberon demands that she give him the boy, but she refuses.”Titania stole a boy. Is it really that easy for a queen to steal a boy? lol
  • “Oberon decides to play a trick on Titania and put some pansy juice on her eyes. The magical juice will make her fall in love with first person she sees upon waking up.” I don’t get why Oberon initially decided to use pansy juice. I mean what was he planning to accomplish with that? That Titania will fall in love with him so bad she’ll release the boy? Dude, what?
  • “Demetrius deserts Helena in the forest, leaving her alone.” Of course, Demetrius will leave you Helena. You just gave him the chance to stop the love of his life from eloping.
  • “Oberon decides that he will change this situation”It feels like Oberon was just put there so he can help Helena.
  • “He then finds Titania and drops the juice onto her eyelids. Robin goes to find Demetrius, but instead comes across Lysander and accidentally uses the juice on him… Oberon then puts the pansy juice onto Demetrius’s eyelids…” — Just how much pansy juice do they have on hand? How do you accidentally spill that so many times without using it all up?
  • “She thinks that the two men are trying to torment her for being in love with Demetrius, and becomes furious at their protestations of love.” That moment when Helena got too many suitors she got mad at them? Ganda mo girl. 
  • “Out of fear of censorship, they decide to make the play less realistic. Therefore the lion is supposed to announce that he is not a lion, but only a common man. Bottom also feels obliged to tell the audience that he is not really going to die, but will only pretend to do so.” Is this the first time people used disclaimers? lol
  • “Puck…catches Bottom alone and puts an asses head on him. When Bottom returns to his troupe, they run away out of fear.” How can you have an ass head on you without even knowing it?
  • “Theseus decides to overbear Egeus and let the lovers get married that day with him.” So I guess everything was a blessing in disguise for Hermia and Lysander?
  • “After they leave Puck asks the audience to forgive the actors is they were offended.” Was this the day people started to be offended by fiction? 

This, I believe, is a legit comedy. Even though there are WTF parts, it kinda made me laugh.


So there’s my commentary about some of Shakespeare’s works. Got some ideas, too? Share them at the comments section?

 

 

Blog 10/52 Speaking of Kids

So my grandma told me I should have babies soon so that she’ll still be alive to see her great-grandkids. Like it’s that easy. Like I don’t have things to consider before making that big decision. Like it was her call to decide when I should be making babies. I’m not mad at her or anything, (I love her.) I’m just disappointed that she thought it was her call. She said I was being selfish for not sharing this part of my life with them (Read: for not obeying their advice). (My “wedding” plans are another story.)

So I just wanted to share these. Maybe it’ll help people in understanding. These are some of the reasons why I don’t want to have kids yet.

1. I don’t think my partner and I are ready financially.

Having a kid is a great responsibility. I don’t want it to be an accident. I want to want it when they come into my life. I want to tell my partner without hesitation. I want to be ready and I want to give my future kids the things and opportunities I didn’t have as a kid. My mom raised me to be a very calculative of the things I do, and I think this is one of the things that I really have to be calculative about.

My partner and I wanted to have enough money saved before going that direction. We don’t want to get loans and drown in debt just because we didn’t plan things.

2. I am not sure if I’m mentally stable to handle kids.

My younger cousins know this (I’m an only child.), I always tell them to shut up when I’m not in the mood to listen to them babble. I told them that when I am ready for them, I will talk to them.

However, even if this worked on them, I don’t think it’ll work on a toddler, much less a crying baby. I can’t tell my crying baby to “shut up, I’m trying to sleep. ”

And in response to this, people always tell me, “You only say that because you aren’t a mom yet. When you have kids, you’ll change.” And I’m like FU, you don’t know that. You don’t know me. I have the right to be afraid and you can’t just disregard my fear. I know I’m not ready AND I WILL HAVE BABIES WHEN I’M READY!

3. I’m afraid to give birth.

Another reason I’m afraid is because I’m afraid of my vagina tearing. Upon doing some “research”, the vagina “technically” tears (or is cut by the doctor) when a woman gives birth. I’m afraid of that. If my dysmenorrhea taught me something, it’s that that kind of pain is so great, I might pass out.

And you know, just the thought of my skin tearing? Or being cut? And sewn back? *cringe*

4. I don’t know if I’ll ever be ready.

Having kids is such a huge responsibility, I don’t think I’ll ever do it. But, you know, maybe I will. I like how cute kids are, especially the babies and the toddlers. But it’s different when it’s not yours. When it starts crying you can give it back to the parents. You aren’t the one needing to wake up in the middle of the night to shush and rock it back to sleep.

And in my opinion, a person can’t turn back from being an adult the moment she has a kid. And I am not very good at adulting. I mean, I try. but I’m not sure that’s enough to get an A+ in Adulting 101.

Do you think the same? Tell me in the comments?

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Blog 9/52 Favorite TV Series

Here’s the thing. I know I haven’t finished all the TV Series I mentioned in my last favorites post, except Legend of the Blue Sea (it was awesome btw). And Good Witch as I have finished watching all the available episodes on Netflix. I’m still waiting for them to upload Season 3.

But once more, I’m gonna list all the TV series that currently I’m obsessing over.

1. Vampire Diaries

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The series revolve around vampires, some witches, and some humans living in Mystic Falls. I’m currently on Season 7. I’m upset that they haven’t uploaded Season 8, which concluded like months ago.

I love Caroline’s character. She’s just very real and I just love how her character progresses in the show.

2. Riverdale

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I know some of you loved the Archie Comics as much as I did. Seeing the characters brought to life like this is amazing. Plus, I love shows with mystery and drama.

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I’m also in love with Cole Sprouse (portraying Jughead Jones)…

And because I love them bad girls:

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and Camila Mendes (portraying Veronica Lodge).

Even though she’s no Blair Waldorf. (You and I both know there is only one Blair Waldorf.) I just adore her feistiness.

Side note: Who do you think killed Jason Blossom, though? I can’t quite figure that out yet. 

3. The Magicians

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I haven’t started to watch the second season though, as I waited for it to conclude first. I wanna watch without waiting for the next episode. And I’m also afraid of what’s gonna happen to them. Last season’s finale was kinda extreme. I loved this show so much I even went to their site (which is like Pottermore) and took the Brakebills exam.

So far, these are the shows I’m obsessing over. Come July 2017, though, Game of Thrones will be added to this list. Face With Tears of Joy on EmojiOne 3.0 What shows are you watching? Tell me in the comments?

Toodles!

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Blog 8/52 A Day in the Life

According to Wikipedia, “A Day in the Life” is a song by the English band, Beatles.

Here’s the lyrics:

I read the news today, oh boy
About a lucky man who made the grade
And though the news was rather sad
Well I just had to laugh
I saw the photograph.

He blew his mind out in a car
He didn’t notice that the red lights had changed
A crowd of people stood and stared
They’d seen his face before
Nobody was really sure
If he was from the House of Lords.

I saw a film today, oh boy
The English army had just won the war
A crowd of people turned away
But I just had to look
Having read the book
I’d love to turn you on.

Woke up, fell out of bed,
Dragged a comb across my head
Found my way downstairs and drank a cup,
And looking up I noticed I was late.

Found my coat and grabbed my hat
Made the bus in seconds flat
Found my way upstairs and had a smoke,
Somebody spoke and I went into a dream.

I read the news today oh boy
Four thousand holes in Blackburn, Lancashire
And though the holes were rather small
They had to count them all
Now they know how many holes it takes to fill the Albert Hall.
I’d love to turn you on.


Okay. I’ll tell you what happens everyday. But I’m gonna warn you, it’s boring.

Today, I woke up around 6:30pm. I did some chores, woke boyfriend around 7:30pm. We ate. Helped boyfie prep for the day, then he left for work around 9pm.

I started checking my writers’ submissions. I read them, checked them for grammar errors and edited them. I do all this while browsing Facebook and talking to some friends who’re still awake. Once those friends fall asleep or just stop replying, I take out my planner/journal and write about my thoughts. Then, I open my blog and try to come up with words. Sometimes, I also try to add word count to my WIPs.

I respond to my clients, and check for new requests.

When all is done, I open Netflix and just chill until he comes home around 7am in the morning. Face With Tears of Joy on EmojiOne 3.0